World Cup Preview: Group D

Australia
Nickname: The Socceroos
FIFA ranking: 20
How they got here: Cruised through, after switching from Oceania to the Asian confederation -- which meant that they no longer had to win a play-off against a South American team to qualify.
Record in previous tournaments: Knocked out at the round of 16 in 2006 -- their best-ever finish -- after a controversial game against Italy.
Manager: Pim Verbeek, previously the assistant to Magical Guus Hiddink^TM and manager of South Korea.
Players to watch: Everton's Tim Cahill, an attacking midfielder with an uncanny ability to be in the right place to thump in a header, is the team's talisman. Apart from that, players like Lucas Neill and Brett Emerton are solid but not spectacular. Harry Kewell could provide some surprises from the wing, if he doesn't fall apart halfway through the tournament.

Germany
Nickname: They're called the Fußballnationalmannschaft, which isn't really a nickname (it means "the national men's football team") but is kind of awesomely homoerotic.
FIFA ranking: 6
How they got here: A stereotypically efficient campaing, as they topped their group in Europe.
Record in previous tournaments: Have won three times (1954, 1974 and 1990). Runners-up to Brazil in 2002, and finished third in 2006 after an extra-time loss to Italy in the semi-finals.
Manager: Joachim Löw, who was Jürgen Klinsmann's right-hand man in 2006.
Players to watch: Veteran striker Miroslav Klose has 48 goals in 93 international caps; he'll probably be partnered with Cologne's Lukas Podolski. Erstwhile captain Michael Ballack is out of the tournament with a knee injury, which is a big loss. Philipp Lahm is a talented (albeit pocket-sized) defender, but he doesn't have quite the same presence. Bastian Schweinsteiger will step into Ballack's place in the centre; also keep an eye on midfielder Mesut Ozil, just 21 years old.

Ghana
Nickname: The Black Stars
FIFA ranking: 32
How they got here: Struggled in the first round of qualifying but eased through their final group.
Record in previous tournaments: Lost to Germany at the round of 16 in 2006, their first appearance at the tournament.
Manager: Milovan Rajevac, who was previously a coach in Serbia.
Players to watch: Asamoah Gyan will probably be the lone striker, supported by Sulley Muntari and captain Stephen Appiah in midfield. But the absence of Chelsea's Michael Essien due to a knee injury
is a massive blow (notably, he was suspended for that loss against Germany in 2006).

Serbia
Nickname: The White Eagles
FIFA ranking: 15
How they got here: Top of a qualifying group that included France and Romania.
Record in previous tournaments: This is Serbia's first World Cup as a fully independent nation. But they had a number of quarter-final appearances and one fourth-place finish (in 1962) as part of Yugoslavia.
Manager: Radomir Antic, who took over in 2008 after a variety of coaching gigs in Spain.
Players to watch: Manchester United's Nemanja Vidic, who has the killer robot look that you expect from a world-class centre-back. Captain Dejan Stankovic, who's fresh from winning the Champions League with Inter, will be pulling the strings in midfield, while Milan Jovanovic is a threat on the wing.

Verdict on the group
This is a tough one to call -- especially after the injuries to Ballack and Essien, the teams could be quite evenly matched. I do expect Germany to go through, because the Germans just don't get knodked out at the group stage. They just don't. As for the second team, I was going to pick Australia, but looking at the order of their matches (starting against Germany is never a good thing), I'm going to vote for Serbia instead.

Euro 2008 Final: Spain 1-0 Germany

I wanted to get this post up sooner, but I've been blog-less for the past few days as a result of a beer-filled long weekend out of town. I did watch the final on Sunday, though, and although I was cheering for Germany, I can't say I'm disappointed that Spain won -- they were the best team both over the course of the tournament and in the final itself.

Germany started the stronger team in this game, with Miroslav Klose spurning a good chance to score as early as the third minute. They looked particularly dangerous as they attacked Sergio Ramos down Spain's right wing. But Spain were on top soon enough, with Jens Lehmann called on to make a great save in the 14th minute when Christoph Metzelder and his awful playoff beard almost deflected Andres Iniesta's shot into the net for an own-goal.

In the absence of injured Golden Boot winner David Villa, Fernando Torres was playing as a lone striker -- a familiar role from his time at Liverpool -- and causing lots of trouble for the lumbering German defence. He'd already sent a header off the post with Jens Lehmann well beaten, when he scored the game's only goal in the 32nd minute. Xavi's through ball split the defenders, Torres outmuscled Philipp Lahm and then, with Lehmann coming out to claim the ball, clipped it perfectly over the keeper and into the net.

If Torres was the pivotal figure for Spain, so too was Michael Ballack for Germany. Ballack has had horrible luck in major finals, and it didn't get any better for him here. He was already hampered by a calf injury -- although I think you'd have had to chain him down to stop him playing -- and then he got a cut over the eye toward the end of the first half, after a collision with Marcos Senna.

I think that just added to his sense of frustration, because a few minutes later he got booked for an altercation with Carles Puyol, and he seemed to spend the second half getting increasingly pissed off at the entire world. He did have a couple decent shots on goal over the course of the game -- one deflected by Ramos, another one going just barely wide -- but mostly he was cro-magnon-ing around and fouling people.

And with Ballack not at 100%, the rest of the team was also malfunctioning. Philipp Lahm was hauled off at halftime and replaced by Marcell Jansen -- supposedly due to injury, but come on. (Poor Lahm -- I swear I remember him being a good defender; I don't know what went wrong.) Klose got kicked in the balls early in the second half. And then later in the game had the indignity of being replaced by Mario Gomez. It just wasn't a good day for them, really.

Germany did have a good spell of pressure partway through the second half, but Iker Casillas and his defence held firm. Luis Aragones sent on Xabi Alonso for Cesc Fabregas -- who'd been much less effective than in the semi-final -- to shore up the midfield, and shortly thereafter brought on more fresh legs in the form of Santi Cazorla -- to replace David Silva, who'd come dangerously close to getting sent off after going nose-to-nose with Lukas Podolski. (I think Silva must have been on his tippy-toes at the time.)

There was a chance that things could've gotten out of hand, with the Germans trying to muscle their way back into the game, but the referee did a good job of calming things down -- although I still don't understand why he'd booked Casillas in the first half. Anyway, Spain reasserted themselves, passing their way through Germany as they'd been doing all game. Lehmann had to make another good save from Ramos' diving header in the 66th minute, and then from the corner, Iniesta's shot was cleared off the line by Torsten Frings.

The clock ticked inexorably down, and Germany had still only managed one shot on goal all game. Spain, meanwhile, continued to threaten, with Dani Guiza coming on for Fernando Torres -- who'd worked his ass off -- and almost immediately setting up Senna for what should have been their second goal. Spain might have liked to pad their one-goal lead, as there was always a chance that Germany could surprise them with an equalizer, but the Germans were mostly just lumping the ball forward in the late stages of the game, and Spain were always able to regain possession.

And so it finished 1-0 -- albeit a pretty action-packed one-goal game -- with Spain becoming European champions for only the second time. They'd already overcome their reputation as chokers with that penalty shootout victory over Italy, but they've now killed it off completely with such a comprehensive win. As for Germany, I said before the game that they had been more than the sum of their parts, but they showed their limitations here against a Spanish team that was undoubtedly superior.


I'm not going to pick a team of the tournament, because I'd probably end up like the TSN/Sportsnet crew, who went with an unorthodox sort of 2-5-3 formation. But a few awards to round things up...

Game of the tournament: Turkey 3-2 Czech Republic
It's hard to narrow this down, because there were so many great games, and Turkey in particular were involved in several incredible results. But this was the epitome of their tournament: a comeback from 2-0 down with 15 minutes to go that was highlighted by brain farts on the part of both goalkeepers, with Petr Cech dropping a cross to gift Turkey an equalizer in the 87th minute, and then Volkan Demirel getting sent off in stoppage time for flattening Jan Koller -- no mean feat.

Runner-up: Russia 3-0 Holland
Holland had disposed of Italy and France with ease in the supposed group of death, but an Andriy Arshavin-inspired Russia were brilliant in the quarterfinal and essentially beat them at their own whirlwind attacking game.

Goal of the tournament: Wesley Sneijder vs. Italy
A textbook-perfect counter-attacking move, with Gio van Bronckhorst clearing the ball off the line at a corner, and then pelting downfield to get involved again with a crossfield pass to Dirk Kuyt. Kuyt then headed the ball down for Sneijder to hook it past Gigi Buffon from an almost impossible angle. A fantastic team goal and a fantastic finish from Sneijder.

Runner-up: Bastian Schweinsteiger vs. Turkey
Schweinsteiger and Lukas Podolski sometimes seem to have a telepathic connection -- see also Schweinsteiger's goal against Portugal in the preceding game; here, Podolski broke down the left and crossed to Schweinsteiger coming in from the other flank, who flicked the ball brilliantly across the keeper with the outside of his right boot.

Player of the tournament: Marcos Senna
UEFA's technical panel may disagree with me -- they gave the Golden Ball to another Spanish midfielder, Xavi. But Xavi had periods where he was brilliant and periods where he was invisible. Senna was also often invisible, but for the right reasons: you want your defensive midfielder to go unnoticed, because that means he's doing his job. He was the solid base for Spain's tiki-taka attacking play, and a shield for their not always convincing defence. Consistently good throughout the tournament.

Hotass of the tournament: Iker Casillas
Captained his team to the title. Possibly the only keeper in Swisstria who actually knew how to deal with crosses. A big part of the reason why Spain gave up only three goals, and none of those in the knockout rounds. Went mano-a-mano with world champion Gianluigi Buffon in a penalty shootout and emerged victorious. And celebrated winning the whole shebang by stripping down and spraying his teammates with champagne. Well done.

Euro 2008 Final Preview

My two favourite teams in the tournament are also the last ones standing, which makes this simultaneously my dream final and a nightmare. I'll be cheering for Germany tomorrow -- I'm half German, and my ancestors would probably rise up to beat me about the head with a beer stein if I didn't -- but I'm sure that Spain will do their best to test my loyalties with their pretty pretty football.

The prevailing opinion seems to be that Spain should win, but I really don't know what to predict. This German team seem to be more than the sum of their parts; Spain, in the past, have been less, but this time they may finally be living up to their talent. Spain have certainly been the best team overall, but let's not forget that You Can Never Count Out The Germans.

Goalkeepers
Iker Casillas versus Jens Lehmann: It's no contest, really. Saint Iker burnished his halo even more in the quarter-final penalty shootout against Italy, whereas Lehmann looked pretty shaky against Turkey and was arguably at fault for both their goals. I'd expect lots of shots from the Spanish team.

Defence
Spain's back four is supposedly their weakness, but they've only given up three goals all tournament. Carles Puyol has been excellent and Sergio Ramos seems to have remembered that he's a defender, not a striker, while Carlos Marchena and Joan Capdevilla have done their jobs well. But they could be vulnerable to set-pieces and crosses, which have led to a lot of Germany's goals. Germany, on the other hand, have been rather porous at the back, with only Philipp Lahm really standing out -- and that not always for the right reasons. Spain should be looking to run at their fullbacks, as Turkey did so effectively.

Midfield
Two contrasting styles in midfield: Spain's short, fluid tiki-taka passing, versus German's more direct, robust style. Spain has a similarly mobile midfield to the other teams that have caused Germany trouble (like Croatia), with players interchanging positions and attacking from all angles. Germany will have to be disciplined to contain them. The Germans will also try to use their physical advantage, as they did against Portugal, to win the ball and then break quickly. Spain prefer to hold onto possession and pass the ball around in their opponents' half, but their slow buildup means that they're not necessarily going to commit people forward too hastily. It should be a very interesting battle.

Strikers
Top scorer David Villa will almost certainly miss the final with an injury, which means Fernando Torres will play up front on his own. Torres hasn't had the greatest tournament, unfortunately. I think he's played well, but the goals just aren't coming, possibly because he's been adjusting to the Spanish style after a year in the Premier League. But he's still the kind of player who can change a game in a moment. Miroslav Klose isn't a world-class striker the way Torres is, but he's got a good track record of scoring in big games for his country.

Predicted lineups
Germany: Lehmann; Friedrich, Metzelder, Mertesacker, Lahm; Schweinsteiger, Frings, Ballack, Hitzlsperger, Podolski; Klose

Spain: Casillas; Ramos, Puyol, Marchena, Capdevilla; Iniesta, Fabregas, Senna, Xavi, Silva; Torres

Euro 2008 Semi-final: Germany 3-2 Turkey

I don't know what it is, but this tournament keeps throwing up dramatic results. Once again Turkey were involved in a game featuring a stunning late victory -- although this time they were on the wrong end of the scoreline. It's just too bad we couldn't see the whole thing, thanks to the broadcasting problems from Vienna.

Turkey were massive underdogs coming into this game, seeing as they had so many players either injured or suspended -- or both -- whereas Germany were able to field the same lineup that had disposed of Portugal so emphatically. But, maybe because their backs were against the wall, Turkey produced an excellent performance, with Germany struggling to match them. Both teams were playing five men across midfield, but Germany were giving up possession too easily, while Turkey were spreading the play well and threatening on both wings.

And the first goal came from one their two wingers, Colin "Kazim Kazim" Kazim-Richards smashing a shot off the crossbar in the 23rd minute, for Ugur Boral to put the rebound in through Jens Lehmann's legs. Turkey were dominating the play, but they couldn't hold their lead for very long. Germany equalized three minutes later with virtually their first chance of the game, Lukas Podolski breaking down the left and crossing to Bastian Schweinsteiger, who flicked the ball across the keeper and into the net.

That was probably Germany's best move of the game, too; despite losing their one-goal advantage, Turkey were still the better team as the match went on. ...As far as I could tell, that is, because the feed went out for long stretches of the second half, apparently because of lightning hitting the broadcast centre in Austria.

Turkey must have been hoping that lightning would strike again for them, but instead it was Germany who took the lead in the 78th minute. Miroslav Klose scored with a header into an empty net after Rustu Recber (sporting a fetching double ponytail in a valiant attempt to win the Bad Hair Award two games running) came out to punch Philipp Lahm's cross and got nowhere near the ball.

But Turkey have been the comeback kings throughout the tournament, and they tied this game up again in the 85th minute. Sabri Sarioglu beat Lahm -- having a rare bad game defensively -- on the left and squared the ball to the near post, where Semih Senturk was able to beat his marker and flick it in past Lehmann. I think Lehmann was partially at fault on Turkey's first goal, and I really don't know what he was doing here -- crouched down, basically waiting for the ball to come to him, as if there wasn't a striker charging at his net.

Lahm redeemed himself, though, with what was ultimately the winning goal just four minutes later. He picked up the ball near midfield, exchanged passes with Thomas Hitzlsperger and burst into the box -- helped by the fact that his marker, Kazim, had gone down injured at the beginning of the move -- where he finished sweetly with a great strike that sent the keeper the wrong way. Turkey still had three minutes of stoppage time to attempt another improbably comeback, but this time Germany were able to hold on to their lead and run the clock down.

It was an excellent performance by Turkey -- in terms of both the quality of their play and the grit they showed -- but Germany have an equally effective never-say-die attitude, and they'll be the team in the finals. They'll have to do better than this, though, if they want to win it all. Maybe Michael Ballack needs to crack some heads together in the dressing room.

Euro 2008: Quarter-final 1

Germany 3-2 Portugal
So, the quarter-finals are off to an excellent start, both from my own perspective (DEUTSCHLAND!) and for those of us who just want to watch good football. The only downside was that we didn't get to see Cristiano Ronaldo cry. (Nor did he take his shirt off, as far as I can tell. Perhaps he's been replaced by an imposter.)

Germany were supposedly the underdogs coming into this match, and perhaps because of that, Joachim Low decided to switch to a 4-5-1 formation to match Portugal's, with Mario Gomez mercifully dropped to the bench and Simon Rolfes replacing the injured Torsten Frings in midfield. Low was banished to the director's box for this match after being sent off against Austria, but he'd done an excellent job of getting his team prepared both tactically and in terms of the effort they put in.

The first 15 minutes or so of the game were pretty open; although Portugal had a couple of early chances, their shots usually went straight at Jens Lehmann, and Germany were doing a good job of closing them down quickly and using their physical advantage to win possession and counter-attack. That's just what they did in the 22nd minute, with a fantastic opening goal: Lukas Podolski played a couple of one-twos with Michael Ballack and Miroslav Klose as he surged down the left wing, and then crossed the ball for Bastian Schweinsteiger, bursting into the box from the opposite flank, to slide the ball in past the keeper at the near post.

Germany added a second goal just a few minutes later, after a run forward by Christoph Metzelder, of all people, who was tripped by Petit about 30 yards out. Schweinsteiger curled the free kick into the box, and Klose shook off his marker for a free header, his first goal of the tournament (maybe he's been liberated by not having Gomez beside him any more?). Portugal looked a bit shell-shocked after that; initially they were still trying to walk the ball into the net, but soon enough they started to press Germany more. And they were rewarded in the 40th minute, as Cristiano Ronaldo's shot was blocked by Jens Lehmann but the rebound fell to Nuno Gomes for an easy finish.

At 2-1, Portugal were right back in it, and the game started to get a bit chippy -- I think my favourite bit was Arne Friedrich fouling Ronaldo and then "accidentally" stepping on his foot for good measure. (Our commentator, incidentally, seemed to think his name was "Arnie," as if he was off governing California in his spare time or something.) Both teams had their share of chances as the second half went on -- Hitzlsperger with a shot over the bar, Deco scoring but being flagged offside, a header over the bar from Pepe -- and it could have gone either way.

But Ballack restored Germany's two-goal lead in the 61st minute, with a header from a free kick that was almost identical to Klose's goal in the first half. I've seen quite a few people commenting that he pushed Paulo Ferreira in the back in the process, but it wasn't much of a push; if you ask me, the bigger problem for Portugal was that Ricardo came haring out of his net for the ball and never got close to it. Plus, you know, how bad is Portugal's marking on set pieces? It surprised me a bit, actually, because I would've thought they were one of the better defences left in the tournament. But you can't leave players like Ballack and Klose open like that. It was all very reminiscent of the 2002 World Cup, when I swear that every single Germany goal was a header from one or the other of them.

With half an hour to go, Portugal were throwing everything forward, with Germany defending deeper and deeper in their own half. On the bench, Phil Scolari looked as if he was in agony every time his team fluffed a chance. He sent on first Nani and then Helder Postiga in the search for another goal, and the two substitutes combined in the 87th mnute, as Nani, with three Germany defenders around him, still found space to clip the ball in to Postiga, who split the two centre-backs and headed it home. That gave them a bit of hope, but in the end they just ran out of time, and it was Germany who are through to the semi-finals, while Portugal have come up short yet again.

A few other things:

• What is with the happy celebratory Euro-pop music every time somebody scores a goal? It keeps getting stuck in my head, which is annoying, although at least it displaces "Maniac" from those awful Kia commercials that we get here OVER AND OVER AND OVER.
  
• Hans-Dieter Flick, Germany's assistant manager, seems to have copied Jogi Low's trademark tailored shirt + trousers combination. Or maybe it's a uniform of some kind.
  
• Did anybody else catch Ballack cuddling first Carvalho and then Ferreira in the tunnel before the game? I wonder if he used some kind of voodoo on them that made them forget how to defend set-pieces.
  
• Something else I'm curious about: Now that Austria and Switzerland are out, are their fans cheering for Germany? Because if Canada were hosting a tournament and in a similar situation, we certainly wouldn't be supporting the USA.

Bad hair of the day award: I was all set to give it to Cristiano Ronaldo for his stupid quasi-mullet. (He has clearly had it cut recently, and yet he still has those little bits of hair on the nape of his neck. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, WHY?) But then I saw Torsten Frings in a backwards baseball cap over his flowing locks. I don't really know what he's going for here, but to me he looks like somebody who should be featured in the German version of Crap Email from a Dude. Anyway, sorry, Ronniecakes. Better luck next time. Maybe you can console yourself by going home and rolling around in your piles of money.

Euro 2008: Day 10

Germany 1-0 Austria
It wasn't exactly an inspiring victory, but Germany have booked their place in the quarter-finals with this win. They've made hard work of what should have been an easy group, but now it's time for them to really get their act together for the knock-out stages. They did at least look much more solid defensively here, although that's kind of hard to judge against a team as goal-shy as Austria. Joachim Low juggled the back four a bit, bringing in Arne Friedrich at right-back and moving Philipp Lahm to the left in place of Marcell Jansen (supposedly injured, but I wouldn't be so sure).

The German midfield still looks a bit out of sorts, though, and their strikers are also having problems. Particularly Mario Gomez, who wasted three good chances in the first 10 minutes -- including an absolute sitter that he ballooned over the bar from about a yard out. Unbelievable. I'm not really sure how he keeps getting picked, because he's been equally useless in all three games so far. I think they might want to move Lukas Podolski up front with Miroslav Klose for the next game, and bring in Bastian Schweinsteiger on the left of midfield. At least Podolski has proved that he knows how to find the net.

Oh, right, I'm supposed to be talking about this game. Not a whole lot to say about the first half, really. Austria tried hard, but they just don't know what to do once they get into the penalty box. The closest they came was an extremely weak penalty shout, when Erwin Hoffer backed into Christoph Metzelder. But generally the Germans looked in control without creating much themselves either.

The main incident of the first half wasn't even on the pitch but on the sidelines, when both managers were rather bizarrely banished to the stands just before halftime for a bit of nothing. I don't know if they got into it with the fourth official, or each other, or what, but it seemed like an overly harsh reaction from the ref -- Phil Scolari would be very disappointed; nobody even took a swing at anybody. Actually, if anyone was going to be sent off, it should have been Rene Aufhauser earlier in the half, for pushing Podolski in the face. But he was luckier than Schweinsteiger was against Croatia, because the referee didn't see it and didn't even book him.

The key moment of the game was right at the beginning of the second half, when Germany were awarded a free kick just outside the box for Andreas Ivanschitz's foul on Lahm. Michael Ballack stepped up to take it and smashed the ball past the wall and into the net. Best free kick of the tournament. He's been admitted that he's been underperforming so far, but he redeemed himself with that goal. The rest of his team seemed to take confidence from the goal, although they weren't able to extend their lead over Austria. They'll have to do better than that against Portugal.


Croatia 1-0 Poland
I swear I watched this, but none of it really registered with me. It wasn't an entirely meaningless game, since Poland still had a chance to go through depending on what happened in the other match, but Michael Ballack's goal for Germany put an end to that.

The game got off to a fairly even start, but Croatia became more dominant as the first half went on. That continued after half-tim, with Ivan Klasnic scoring the only goal in the 52nd minute, from Daniel Pranjic's cutback. (Klasnic, incidentally, has made an amazing comeback after not one but two kidney transplants -- he apparently wears a fibreglass shield to protect himself on the pitch.)

That goal basically killed off any remaining hope for Poland, and Croatia were happy to just pass the ball around and wait for the clock to tick down the remaining half an hour. Anyway, Slaven Bilic should be happy with his team, as he made a slew of changes to the lineup but still won pretty easily, making Croatia the first team into the quarter-finals with a perfect 3-0 record.


Next up: Germany play Portugal on Thursday, in a replay of their bronze medal match from the last World Cup, while group winners Croatia face Turkey on Friday

Bad hair of the day award: Vedran Runje, Croatia's backup keeper, who made his first -- and probably only -- appearance at the tournament with a half-ponytail and lime-green scrunchie. (Sadly I cannot find a good picture of said scrunchie.)

Euro 2008: Day 6

Croatia 2-1 Germany
So much for Germany's status as tournament favourites. I don't know if they just collapsed under the weight of expectations after their first game or what, but if so, Dear boys: You are not Spain. Stop being all neurotic. Love, me.

The first sign that maybe it wasn't going to be Germany's day came about 20 minutes in, after a relatively quiet start by both teams, as Mario Gomez put the ball into the net only for it to be (correctly) ruled out for offside. A few minutes later, it was Croatia who took the lead with a cross from the left wing that was poked into the net by Dario Srna, who'd got in behind Marcell Jansen. The Germans had several chances to equalize before halftime, but nothing came of it: a miss by Gomez, Michael Ballack's free kick parried by the keeper, a header over the bar by Christoph Metzelder, another goal ruled out for a spurious foul by Gomez...

Croatia also had chances to extend their lead -- Niko Kranjcar wasted a couple of shots -- with the German defence looking decidedly shaky and Jens Lehmann being his usual nutty self. (I think I actually saw him biting the ball at one point. The hell?) Slaven Bilic had changed things after the game against Austria, putting an extra man in midfield, and he had his team fired up, passing well, pressing forward to support their lone striker, and closing Germany down quickly to deny them opportunities.

Joachim Low reshuffled his lineup at halftime, bringing David Odonkor on in place of the hapless Jansen, but they all just looked out of sorts -- as if the entire team was cranky from missing their afternoon nap. And the changes didn't have much impact, as Croatia scored again in the 62nd minute, a long shot from Ivan Rakitic on the right wing deflecting off Lukas Podolski and rebounding off the post for Ivica Olic to bury the rebound, with Jens Lehmann scrambling (and incidentally, I think he reacted late to the first goal too).

Bastien Schweinsteiger came on a bit later for Gomez (who's been mediocre in both games so far and needs to be benched), and although he had a shot tipped just wide, his main impact on the game was getting sent off in stoppage time for a brainless shove on Jerko Leko. Podolski finally scored for Germany in the 78th minute, volleying home his shot after Ballack had knocked down Philipp Lahm's cross from the left wing. Podolski and Lahm, by the way, are probably the only two German players who came out of this game with much credit. Ballack, who's supposed to lead by example, mostly just stormed around and pouted -- plus of course he got booked for a petulant tackle late on. Anyway, you would've expected Germany to really go for it after they made it 2-1, but Croatia still had way too much of the ball. They all just looked stunned when the final whistle blew, while the Croatians -- especially Bilic -- were going crazy celebrating an excellent win.


Austria 1-1 Poland
Austria, in constrast to their German cousins, played spirited attacking football, as if they were completely free of expectations of any kind. The only thing they were missing, sadly, was the ability to put the ball in the back of the net. Three times in the first 15 minutes they had clear chances on net, only to be stymied by a combination of terrible finishing and excellent goalkeeping by Artur Boruc. Possibly they were jinxed, or possibly Boruc had put high-powered magnets in both his socks and the ball. You never know.

Poland hadn't played very well to start, but they got the opening goal against the run of play after half an hour: A cross from Ebi Smolarek, a shot by Marek Saganowski, and Roger Guerreiro scoring the rebound. But they couldn't capitalize on that and extend their lead in the second half, with Jurgen Macho making a series of good saves. Instead, Austria were gifted a lifeline in stoppage time, with a penalty awarded after Mariusz Lewandowski dragged Sebastian Prodl down in the box while defending a free kick. Ivica Vastic stepped up to take it and took it well -- he apparently won himself free beer for life in the process, by the way -- to keep his team in the tournament for now.


What this all means is that Croatia are into the quarter-finals as group winners, while all three of the other teams are still alive depending on various permutations. If Austria beat Germany in their final game -- which is not so out of the realm of probability as it once seemed -- then the hosts will go through. You have to expect that Germany will get the win they need, but then they'll have to face Portugal in the quarters; they likely would've had to meet them at some point anyway, but it's still not a pleasant prospect for the Germans.


Next up in Group B: Austria v. Germany and Croatia v. Poland, both at 2:30 pm (ET) on Monday

Bad hair of the day award: Bastian Schweinsteiger and his platinum blonde monstrosity. Annie Lennox wants her hair back, Schweini. (I am also dubious about Lukas Podolski's patchy hair colour, but I'll give him a pass because at least he was useful, whereas Schweinsteiger gets points deducted for being sent off.)

Euro 2008: Day 2

Croatia 1-0 Austria
It was the worst possible start for Austria: conceding a penalty in the first five minutes, after Ivica Olic was brought down in the box by Rene Aufhauser. A ballsy call by the referee, awarding a penalty against the hosts so early on, but I think it was the right one, and Luka Modric put it away easily. Austria looked stunned, and Croatia dominated for most of the first half, holding on to possession well. But the Austrians did start to try a bit more as halftime approached, rather than just hoofing the ball clear and hoping that Pogatetz wouldn't get sent off.

Austria got better as the game went on and were pushing the Croatians especially hard for the last 20 minutes or so, looking for an equalizer. Umit Korkmaz, in particular, looked lively when he came on as a substitute in the second half. Their main problem was that their final ball into the box was useless, and any shots they had were from too far out to really trouble the Croatian keeper, even with how much the ball supposedly moves. As for Croatia, it seemed like they were really missing Eduardo to score some goals for them. Either that or they just didn't care much -- aside from Olic, who was causing trouble for the Austrian defenders with his determined running all game. A bit surprising, really, because you'd think Slaven Bilic would tear a strip off them for a performance like this.

I do wonder if the game would've gone differently if it hadn't been for that early penalty. Croatia certainly would have had to push harder for a goal, while I suspect that Austria would have been content to play for the draw. I still think that Austria will have problems getting out of the group -- unless their finishing improves rapidly -- but they certainly didn't embarrass themselves here. Croatia, on the other hand, should be considered the very darkest of dark horses unless they get their act together pretty damn quick.


Germany 2-0 Poland
Today's drinking game: Take a sip every time the commentators refer to the German team as "efficient." Although, to be fair, it is a pretty accurate description. Germany set the tone for the game with a great early chance, as Michael Ballack played Miroslav Klose into the box. Klose could have shot himself but instead passed it to Mario Gomez, who slid in and just barely missed the ball. It was a sign of things to come; in the 20th minute, Klose broke through the Polish defence once again, this time squaring the ball to Lukas Podolski to finish cleanly -- the two Polish-born players combining against their birth country.

Podolski added a second goal in the second half, again set up (sort of) by Klose -- he whiffed at the ball in the box, it fell to Podolski and he hammered it into the net with his left foot. Podolski's had a so-so couple of years at Bayern Munich, but judging by this game -- where he was played out of position, nominally on the left of midfield -- he's set to reproduce the good international form that led to him being named young player of the tournament at the 2006 World Cup, ahead of Cristiano Ronaldo.

All in all, I thought it was a good performance by Germany. They like to play quick, direct football, but they can also hold onto possession and move the ball around nicely. Michael Ballack wasn't exactly outstanding but still had a good game, including a great shot in the second half that Artur Boruc just barely tipped over the ball, and it's nice to see him and Torsten Frings playing together in midfield again. Germany's weakness, as expected, might be Jens Lehmann, who did keep a clean sheet but looked kind of erratic nonetheless. As for Poland, they still have not managed to beat Germany...ever. They pressed hard -- Brazilian-born Guerrero, especially, looked good when he came on as a sub -- but the Germans were fit and well organized. I do think that Poland could get out of the group ahead of Croatia, based on these two games, but they're going to need more help for Ebi Smolarek up front.


Next up in Group B: Germany v. Croatia, Austria v. Poland, both on Thursday

Bad hair of the day award: Austria's Ronald Gercaliu, for his skunk-stripe pseudo-mohawk. At least they've won something.

Euro 2008 Preview: Group B

Austria, Croatia, Germany, Poland

Germany couldn't have asked for a better group, really. They should go through easily –possibly all the way to the final, what with having the easier side of the draw and (practically) home field advantage. I expect Croatia to be the team to join them in the quarter-finals. Poland did very well in qualifying, but I don't think they can keep it up in the tournament. Australia will just be hoping that they can manage to pick up a point or two.

AUSTRIA
FIFA rank: 101
Odds of winning: 100-1
Coach: Josef Hickersberger
How they got here: Qualified automatically as co-hosts
Past record: This is their first ever appearance in at a European championship, and their last World Cup was 1998, when they were eliminated at the group stage
Questions to ask:

• Will their own fans get behind them, seeing as they were circulating a petition before the tournament trying to get the team to drop out?
  
• Captain Andreas Ivanschitz is supposedly known as the Austrian David Beckham: is that a good thing or not?
  
• How bad is it when the only name on the roster I recognize is Middlesbrough's Emanuel Pogatetz?

Why to cheer for them: You feel like the home team ought to win at least one game.

CROATIA
FIFA rank: 13
Odds of winning: 12-1
Coach: Slaven Bilic
How they got here: Qualified top of their group, ahead of Russia and England
Past record: Finished third in their group at Euro 2004; also eliminated at the group stage in the 2006 World Cup
Questions to ask:

• How will they cope without Eduardo up front?
  
• Will playmaker Luka Modric prove that he was worth all the money Tottenham just paid for him?
  
• Just how cool is Slaven Bilic?

Why to cheer for them: They're the official dark horse candidates of the tournament.

GERMANY
FIFA rank: 5
Odds of winning: 4-1
Coach: Joachim Low
How they got here: Qualified easily, but – perhaps intentionally – slipped to second in their group behind the Czech Republic
Past record: Finished third in their group at Euro 2004 (they haven't won a game at the Euros since 1996!); third place in the 2006 World Cup
Questions to ask:

• How will Jens Lehmann perform, after spending most of the year on the Arsenal bench? And will he start a fight with anyone?
  
• Michael Ballack, now in form for Chelsea, will be running the midfield, but which of their plethora of strikers will be providing the goals up front?
  
• Will Jogi Low (and his natty scarf) prove that he was really the brains behind their 2006 World Cup campaign?

Why to cheer for them: They actually know how to win on penalties.

POLAND
FIFA rank: 27
Odds of winning: 50-1
Coach: Leo Beenhakker
How they got here: Somewhat surprisingly, finished first in their group ahead of Portugal and Serbia
Past record: They've never qualified for a European championship before; went out at the group stage at the 2006 World Cup
Questions to ask:

• How *did* they manage to do so well in qualifying?
  
• Why does Poland seem to produce lots of good goalkeepers and not much else?
  
• They're defensively disciplined, but do they have anybody who can grab a goal for them when they counter-attack?

Why to cheer for them: You like watching Artur Boruc taunt opposing fans.

Women's World Cup Final

Germany 2-0 Brazil

The final match featured the two countries that have undoubtedly been the best teams over the course of the tournament -- albeit with very different styles of play. All the cliches about the men's teams -- Germany strong, well organized, good in the air and clinical in front of goal; Brazil full of flair but weak at the back, and not afraid of a bit of simulation -- were equally applicable here. And in fact this was a replay of the men's World Cup final from 2002, even ending with an identical scoreline -- although it was 2-0 in favour of Germany this time around.

Brazil's defensive shakiness was apparent from the outset, with Kerstin Garefrekes shooting into the side netting, but nevertheless it was the Brazilians who had the better of the early chances and nearly scored from a free kick by Daniela in the 7th minute. Daniela also hammered a volley off the post in the 23rd minute -- she had a number of good chances throughout the game, but just couldn't seem to score. Germany also wasted a few chances and were having problems coping with the Brazilians' pace at the back, but they held on well and it was all scoreless going into halftime.

Germany came out stronger in the second half, and in the 51st minute, captain Birgit Prinz broke the deadlock. The ball was fed forward to Sandra Smisek -- who'd spurned a great opportunity to score in the first half -- and she checked back and laid it off to Prinz, who beat Andreia from 10 yards out. Brazil looked for an equalizer immediately, with a breakaway by Marta, but she was denied by a last-ditch tackle in the box. Germany responded by almost doubling their lead from a corner kick, as Annike Krahn's header flashed just wide of the net.

Then, in the 62nd minute, the moment that could have changed the match: Another break forward by Brazil, this time by Cristiane, and again the player was taken down in the box. But this time the referee rightly awarded a penalty against Linda Bresonik, which Marta stepped up to take. It wasn't well taken, though -- fairly central, and at the right height for the keeper -- and was easily blocked by Nadine Angerer, who had an excellent game in goal for Germany. A few minutes later, she followed up her penalty save by diving to push a free kick onto the post and preserve her record streak without conceding a goal.

Brazil continued to throw players forward, with Germany content to fend them off and look to attack on the break. It must have been a long, nervous second half for the Germans, though, as their second goal didn't come until the 85th minute, when substitute Fatmire Bajramaj won a corner that was headed in powerfully by Simone Laudehr to guarantee her team the victory. It made Germany the first team to win back-to-back Women's World Cups. And although there were good performances all over the pitch, from players on both sides, it ultimately came down to the two stars: Birgit Prinz, who delievered when it counted, and Marta, who didn't.

After the game, Marta was awarded both the Golden Ball and the Golden BootShoe. (I wonder if they're still voting on that before the final is over.) Birgit Prinz had to settle for the Silver Shoe -- and of course the World Cup itself, which is not a bad consolation prize.

The USA recovered a bit of dignity in the bronze medal match, beating Norway 4-1 to claim third place, with a brace from Abby Wambach. Hope Solo? Not even on the bench. Ouch. That's going to be a long, cold plane ride home.

And just to throw my two cents in: Yes, her post-game interview probably wasn't the smartest thing she could have done. If she'd kept her mouth shut, she'd be PR gold right now. But I can't fault her too much for not showing loyalty to her team, when it doesn't seem that they'd shown her much loyalty either with the original decision to bench her. (And if anything, she was criticizing the coaching decisions, not her teammates themselves.) But it seems to me that they're using her to deflect attention from the fact that the rest of the team didn't play well, and I think the way they've made her into a scaepgoat for their own failure is really shabby.

Women's World Cup: Semi-finals

Germany 3-0 Norway
This matchup between two of the traditional powers of women's football was actually much closer than the score would suggest. Both teams started strongly, and it was a very fast, open game, with Germany and Norway taking it in turns to break downfield, and only some excellent tackles from both sides preventing a goal. Norway probably had the better of the early chances, but Germany were always looking to cause trouble with Birgit Prinz and Kerstin Garefrekes running at the Norwegian defenders. And it was Prinz who created the opening goal just before halftime: fed from the wing by Fatmire Bajramaj, who'd come on as a sub just moments before, she cut the ball back across the 6-yard box, only for Norway's Trine Ronning to head it into her own net.

Norway almost equalized from a corner soon after, but they were still trailing at halftime and Germany were the stronger team after the break. The Germans' second goal didn't come until the 70th minute, however, as Kerstin Stegemann looped the ball over the keeper and in off the far post. The third goal came just five minutes later, as Martina Mueller pounced on an underhit backpass to put the final nail in the coffin for Norway.


USA 0-4 Brazil
I have to admit that I was shocked by this result: the pre-tournament favourites beated by upstart Brazil. (Shocked, and a little bit gloating; that's what you get for that obnoxious Nike campaign.)

The big story obviously is coach Greg Ryan's decision to replace Hope Solo with Brianna Scurry in goal. Ryan's going to get a lot of stick for this, and rightly so; Solo gave up two goals in the USA's opening game against North Korea but hadn't put a foot wrong since, and she deserved to keep her place, no matter how experienced Scurry is. Ryan supposely felt that Scurry's shot-stopping ability was more suited to the Brazilian's style of play, but nevertheless, switching goalies partway through a tournament is just dumb. First of all there's the always touchy question of whether your keeper will be psychologically prepared and confident, and second there's the risk that you'll mess up the all-important communication between the keeper and the defenders. I suspect that's what led to the first goal, an own-goal from a corner: in the replay you could see Scurry calling for the ball, but Leslie Osborne intervened and headed it into her own net. And it's possible that Scurry was at fault for Brazil's second goal, too -- a low, hard shot by Marta that beat her at the near post.

The USA's problems were compounded by Shannon Boxx being sent off for a second yellow just before halftime -- a terrible call by the referee. It looked like Boxx and Cristiane had just gotten their feet tangled up accidentally, and both players went down together. Cristiane was actually behind Boxx at the time, so if anything the foul should have gone the other way. Even before that, though, the USA was finding it hard to contain Brazil, with the Brazilians' pace and skill on the ball giving them problems from the beginning. Brazil came out strongly in the second half and sliced open the USA again with a goal from Cristiane. After that they had the luxury of slowing the game down and showing off their tricks -- like Marta's flick over the defender for their fourth goal.


The final between Germany and Brazil should be very interesting. I think I've been underestimating Brazil because, although I knew that they could score goals, I suspected that their defence could be kind of shaky. So I'm curious to see what will happen when they come up against a team like Germany that has a solid defense and no problem scoring goals of their own. (Kind of like what I expected from the USA, actually.) I'll be cheering for Germany, like I usually do. I suppose Brazil are the underdogs, but they're still Brazil, and besides, I don't think I can cheer for a team that was diving like they were -- not to mention the way Cristiane celebrated when Boxx got sent off, which just left a bad taste in my mouth. I really have no idea who's going to win, though.

As for the third-place match, the big question is who'll get the start in goal for the USA. And also whether Hope Solo has found the time to punch Greg Ryan in the face.

Women's World Cup: Quarter-finals

Germany 3-0 Korea DPR
Norway 1-0 China
USA 3-0 England
Brazil 3-2 Australia

All the results in this round were pretty much as you'd expect. North Korea worked hard but were eventually dispatched with stereotypical Germany efficiency, with goals from Kerstin Garefrekes, Renate Lingor and Annike Krahn. Hosts China were knocked out by Norway thanks to Isabell Herlovsen's first-half goal, with the Chinese squandering too many chances.

England held the USA to a scoreless draw at halftime and must have been hoping for a repeat of their first-round result against Germany, but the Americans took over after the break, with Abby Wambach, Shannon Boxx and Kristine Lilly all scoring.

In the last of the quarter-finals, Brazil dominated the game and took a 2-0 lead over Australia midway through the first half. But the Matildas fought back and equalized, before Cristiane scored in the 75th minute to take Brazil into the semis.


I also want to go back to the draw between Canada and Australia that ended up with the Canadians being knocked out. Canada took the lead within about 30 seconds, but I think that early goal actually hurt them, because it meant that Australia came at them hard, while Canada just tried to defend. They held out until halftime but Australia equalized soon after, and Canada played much better after that, knowing that they needed a win to progress. It looked like they'd done it when Christine Sinclair headed home in a corner in the 85th minute, but then Cheryl Salisbury scored late in stoppage time to put Australia through.

A dramatic way to go out, but so disappointing for the Canadians, especially after they reached the semi-finals in 2003. I think that maybe they overachieved last time around, and this time they just weren't quite good enough. Although the battle between them and Australia was very close, I didn't see enough to suggest that they would have gone on to beat one of the other teams in the quarter-finals.

Women's World Cup: Day 4

The most notable result from this round of games was England holding Germany to a scoreless draw. It was a thoroughly disciplined performance by England, as the defence stifled the German attack while Kelly Smith, leading the line on her own, harried them at the other end. England allowed Germany very few clear chances at goal, and keeper Rachel Brown was equal to those they did have, including an excellent save late in the game.

Argentina were Germany's victims in their first match, but they put on a much better show against Japan -- possibly heartened by goalkeeper Romina Ferro replacing the unfortunate Vanina Correa. Japan thoroughly dominated in terms of both possession and shots but couldn't seem to score, while Argentina could only muster up one shot on target. The one and only goal came late in the game, Yuki Nagasato pouncing on a rebound in stoppage time to give Japan the win.

That leaves Germany and Japan level with four points atop Group A, although Germany have a far superior goal differential. England trail with two points, but they still have a chance to move on to the next round if they win their next game and beat Argentina by more goals than Japan did.

In Group B, the USA bounced back from the disappointment of their draw against North Korea to defeat Sweden 2-0. Once again it was Abby Wambach (in this case, her presence rather than her absence) who made all the difference as she scored both goals for the USA, from a coolly taken penalty in the first half and a super half-volley in the second.

North Korea also won their second match 2-0, beating Nigeria thanks to two goals in the first half from Kim Kyong Hwa and Ri Kum Suk. Both goals came from set-pieces, the first directly from a corner that looped into the net over keeper Precious Dede (best. name. EVER). The Koreans and the USA are tied and lead the group with four points each; they face Sweden and Nigeria, respectively, in their third game, with both teams knowing that a draw will be enough to see them through to the quarter-finals.

Group A
Argentina 0-1 Japan
England 0-0 Germany

Group B
Sweden 0-2 USA
Korea DPR 2-0 Nigeria

Women's World Cup: Day 1-2

Last summer in the men's World Cup, Germany v. Argentina was one of the best games of the tournament. Not so much with the women's version. This was a blowout. A score you'd usually associate more with, say, Germany v. San Marino. The Germans were helped by some terrible goalkeeping by Vanina Correa, who put the ball in her own net twice, as well as some equally atrocious defending by Argentina; the back line might as well have not even been there for all the good they were. I think they just kind of gave up after the first five goals or so. But even so, it takes a pretty good team to score eleven times in the space of 90 minutes, including hat tricks for both Birgit Prinz and Sandra Smisek. WIR SIND DEUTSCHLAND. WIR SCHTOMPEN ON DIE PUNY SOUTH AMERICANS MIT UNSERE BIG SCHTOMPY BOOTS.

Fortunately, the other matches so far have been much closer. In the other Group A match, Japan scored first with a free kick from Aya Miyama, before England equalized and then took the lead with two quick goals from Kelly Smith. But in injury time, Miyama scored from another free kick on the edge of the box, leaving both teams with a share of the points.

(I'm not going to do the bad hair awards for this tournament, because most of the players just have ponytails, which is boring. But I have to mention Japan's Eriko Arakawa, who has a truly spectacular fro. How do you even head the ball with that?)

Group B, meanwhile, is wide open, as both of those games also ended in a draw. North Korea surprised the favoured Americans with two goals in the space of five minutes, both scored with the USA down to 10 players while Abby Wambach was off having a nasty head wound stitched up. I'm not quite sure why that took the team up so much, though -- if you're going to be missing a player, wouldn't you want it to be a striker?

And finally, Nigeria's Cynthia Uwak scored a late equalizer to give her team a deserved point against Sweden, who'd taken the lead early in the second half with a goal from captain Victoria Svensson.


Group A
Germany 11-0 Argentina
Japan 2-2 England

Group B
USA 2-2 Korea DPR
Nigeria 1-1 Sweden

Women's World Cup Preview: Group A

GERMANY
Nickname: Die Nationalelf (nothing to do with Legolas; it means "the national XI")
Current world ranking: 2
Coach: Silvia Neid, who took over in 2005, having previously led the U-19 side to the title at the world championships in 2004. She was also a member of the German side that lost in the final in 1995.
How they qualified: Won their UEFA qualifying group with a flawless campaign, winning all eight games.
Past record: Reigning world and European champions, Germany are always one of the favourites for the title. Their worst performance was in 1999, when they only made it to the quarter-finals.
Other results: Six-time European champions; they were also bronze medalists at the 2004 Olympics.
Why they could win: Germany are a very talented and physically tough team. They cruised through qualifying, scoring 31 – with goals coming from all sorts of different players – and only conceded three, thanks to the strength of goalkeeper Silke Rottenburg and a solid defence in front of her.
Key players: Striker Birgit Prinz racked up eight goals in qualifying and is a two-time FIFA Women's World Player of the Year. Midfielder Renate Lingor is the team's linchpin; she has great vision and can be deadly from set pieces.
Predicted finish: Runners-up

ENGLAND
Nickname: Three Lions (or should that be the Three Lionesses?)
Current world ranking: 12
Coach: Hope Powell, appointed as the team's first-ever full-time coach (and also their first female coach) in 1998; she racked up 66 caps and 35 goals for England in her career.
How they qualified: Finished on top of a tough UEFA qualifying group that also included France and the Netherlands, with a 6-2-0 record.
Past record: Only one previous appearance at the World Cup, in 1995, when they were knocked out by Germany in the quarter-finals.
Other results: Not much to speak of, although they were semi-finalists at the European championships in 1995.
Why they could win: Women's football in England has made great strides in recent years, boosted by hosting the Euro 2005 tournament, but there have also been setbacks like the Charlton ladies' team being closed down due to lack of funding. They lost 1-0 to China in a recent World Cup warmup game, but they're still riding the high from their successful qualifying campaign, where they only gave up two goals.
Key players: Strikers Rachel Yankey and Kelly Smith, who both play for the quadruple-winning Arsenal ladies' team. Smith was the player of the tournament at the Four Nations Tournament in China last year.
Predicted finish: Quarter-finals

JAPAN
Nickname: Nadeshiko (the Japanese word for the wild pink carnation that has come to symbolise the country's ideal woman)
Current world ranking: 10
Coach: Hiroshi Ohashi, who took over in 2004.
How they qualified: Finished a disappointing fourth at the Asian championship in July 2006, but beat Mexico in a playoff to earn a spot at the World Cup.
Past record: Have qualified for every tournament, but their best result was reaching the quarter-finals in 1995.
Other results: Four-time runners-up at the AFC championship.
Why they could win: Japan has a well-balanced, hard-working team. The players support each other selflessly, and they're good at creating space and passing around opponents. However, they struggled in qualifying, and hard work alone won't be enough to get them through the tournament.
Key players: Midfielder Homare Sawa, Japan's all-time scoring leader, with 60 goals in 118 caps. This is her fourth consecutive World Cup, and she's got lots of experience, having made her first appearance in the Japanese women's league at age 12.
Predicted finish: First-round elimination

ARGENTINA
Nickname: Albicelestes
Current world ranking: 29
Coach: Carlos Borello, who's been in charge since 1998; he previously coached at San Martin de Burzaco in Buenos Aires.
How they qualified: Upset Brazil to win the South American qualifying tournament in November 2006.
Past record: Qualified for the first time in 2003, when they lost all three of their group games and finished with a goal difference of -14.
Other results: Three-time runners-up for the CONMEBOL title, before finally beating Brazil last year.
Why they could win: That victory over Brazil in the South American championship is a big point in their favour, but the fact is that – unlike the situation with the men's teams – Argentina are not nearly as strong as the Brazilians. The Argentines have good passing and ball-control skills, but have been let down by some wayward finishing.
Key players: Striker Maria Belen Potassa, who scored one of the key goals against Brazil and previously played with the U20s in 2006, is quick and has a good shot. Influential veterans include Marisa Perez and Rosana Gomez in midfield, and Romina Ferro in goal.
Predicted finish: First-round elimination

Group Predictions
Germany are the obvious favourites to win the group, and I think they can go all the way to the finals. England may be ranked below Japan, but I see them as a dark-horse candidate here. Unfortunately, the draw means that they'd probably end up facing the USA in the quarter-finals, which would likely spell an end to their campaign. Argentina may have beaten Brazil recently, but I don't think they're ready for the world stage yet.

World Cup Semi-finals

Germany 0-2 Italy
Deutschland, Deutschland über...uh, nobody, actually.

I decided to cheer for Germany after England got knocked out (I'm half German, so it's allowed), and of course that was the kiss of death, as they promptly went down to Italy. Maybe I should have been rooting for Portugal instead.

Still, despite my chosen team losing, it was a great game. And if only the Germans hadn't been collectively possessed by the spirit of Frank Lampard, they might have won. Or, you know, if they had managed not to self-destruct so spectacularly in the last minute of extra time. On the other side you had the evil genius of the Italians, who knew they only needed one goal to win it, and didn't seem that bothered about going to extra time because they figured they'd knick one sooner or later. That second goal was an uncharacteristic extravagance, though -- shouldn't they have been saving it for the final?

• Best player: Fabio Cannavaro, aka the reason the Italian defense is so good. Probably the best player of the tournament so far. (And he doesn't look so bad in his underwear either. I'm just saying.)
  
  
• Best illustration of the fact that goalkeepers are nuts: Jens Lehmann coming way out to collect a stray ball, clocking Fabio Grosso in the process, and then looking down at him disdainfully as the physio came on, all, "Get this riff-raff out of my penalty area."
  
  
• Best dive: Michael Ballack. One of the Italians waved his arm vaguely near Ballack's face, he went down quicker than one of those prostitutes they imported for the tournament, and the ref wisely ignored the whole thing.
  
  
• Best pout: Ballack again. (If he stuck his lip out any further, he'd trip over it. I thought the Germans were supposed to be too Teutonic-ly stoic to pout like that.)

France 1-0 Diving Wankers Portugal
Silly me, somehow I had the idea that the semi-final games were supposed to be exciting. Not this one -- especially not once Zidane had scored. (I'd actually nodded off at that point, but I woke up when the commentators started yelling about a penalty.) After that, it was like France figured Portugal wasn't ever going to put together a proper attack, so they could spend the rest of the game just playing around in midfield, coddling Zizou through to the final and occasionally giving the ball to Ribery to run at the Portuguese defence, just to give the kid something to do.

Portugal's response to all this? Luis Felipe Scolari, master tactician that he is, decided that the best thing to do when you really need a goal is to take off your one and only striker. (Somewhere in Sweden, Sven-Goran Eriksson is thinking, "Damn, I wish I'd thought of that one!") And yeah, it worked about as well as you'd expect. Luckily I'd had a lot of caffeine at half-time so I could stay conscious for the rest of the game.

• Best player: Despite the commentators practically fellating Zizou, I'm going to give it to a defender again, in this case Lilian Thuram. If you've got Eric Abidal in your back line, you've got to be good. Runner-up was Cristiano Ronaldo, who was actually Portugal's most dangerous attacker when he managed to stay vertical.
  
  
• Best illustration of the fact that goalkeepers are nuts: Fabien Barthez punching a free kick straight up in the air and then flailing around helplessly as Figo headed it over the bar. Actually, Fabien Barthez, period.
  
  
• Best dive: Thierry Henry, taking time out from his busy schedule of being caught offside and shrugging Gallic-ly in order to fall down in the 18-yard box. (Yeah, ok, it was a foul, but he still made a meal of it.) Ronaldo tried hard, but he forgot that it helps if the other player actually touches you.
  
  
• Best pout: Poor widdle Ronniecakes takes this one. Who else, really?

World Cup Quarter-finals

The quarter-final matches that didn't make me want to stab anyone, that is...

Germany 1-1 Argentina (Germany wins 4-2 on penalties)
Let's say you're managing Argentina in the World Cup, and you've currently got a slim 1-0 lead over Germany in the quarter-finals. You've got Messi, Aimar and Saviola -- among others -- on the bench. What do you do?

Most of us would probably think, "This German team has been pretty good offensively so far. I don't think a one-goal lead is going to be enough. Their defence, on the other hand, is kind of shaky -- seeing as it mostly involves being tall and blond -- so let's see if we can score another one."

If you're Jose Pekerman, on the other hand, you take a page from Sven Goran Erikson's Big Book of Management Fuck-ups and pull off your main playmaker in favour of a defensive midfielder.

Which worked brilliantly, because Germany promptly went out and equalized.

So Pekerman fell victim to one of the classic blunders. The most famous is never get involved in a land war in Asia, but only slightly less well-known is this: never go up against Germany on penalties when the World Cup is on the line.

(Did you see the pictures of Oliver Kahn hugging Jens Lehmann after the penalty shoot-out? Please tell me I'm not the only one who found that more than a little terrifying.)


Brazil 0-1 France
Somebody should've reminded Brazil that you have to do more than just show up to win the World Cup, no matter how bonito your joga is supposed to be. They never got out of second gear, whereas France has finally shaken off their first-round apathy and totally outclassed the Brazilians in this match.

I still think Thierry Henry needs to spend a little less time complaining about diving and a little more time studying the offside rule, but nevertheless I hope that France knocks those cheating Portuguese wankers out in the next round.


Italy 3-0 Ukraine
Italy, also, are stepping up their performance at just the right time. Admittedly, they had the easiest of all the quarter-final draws, but the Italians looked pretty solid. Their semi-final match with Germany should be fantastic. (Either that, or a deadly nil-nil draw.) As for Ukraine: thanks for playing, we have some lovely parting gifts for you.

The international language of football

Being a football fan takes you to strange places sometimes. In my case, it led to wandering around the streets of beautiful downtown Minden on Tuesday morning, desperately searching for a place to watch the game. The man we stopped on the street kind of looked at us funny when we asked it there was a sports bar open anywhere in town. And even when we explained that no, it wasn't because we wanted a drink at 10:00 am, it was because we wanted to watch the World Cup, he still looked at us funny. But he did direct us to a restaurant that had a TV over the bar (good) and had an all-day breakfast (even better).

There were even a couple of guys at the bar already, watching Germany v. Ecuador. They turned out to be exchange students from Bremen, working for the Ministry of Natural Resources for the summer (poor guys, stuck in northern Ontario rather than at home in Germany, in the middle of the World Cup). They kind of looked askance at my England shirt, but they warmed up when we explained that we were cheering for Germany too. The waitress clearly thought we were all a little nuts, but she humoured us, so it was all good.

Well, except for England's performance against Sweden, which is something best forgotten.

World Cup III: Togo, or not Togo

I've been complaining at being stuck at work while the World Cup matches are on, but the advantage is that I don't feel compelled to watch games like Togo v. Korea or Tunisia v. Saudi Arabia, and I can just follow them online instead. Sounds like both games had a lot of action, but not a lot of skill.

And, actually, you could say the same about Germany v. Poland. The Polish keeper, Boruc, was pretty good, but most of my entertainment came from wondering how many different ways the Germans could find to fuck up in front of goal. Also, Klinsmann really ought to remind them that passing into space is great, but not if your teammates are running in the opposite direction. Still, they got the win, and it looks like Germany will be the first team to book its place in the final 16.

Of the other games that I actually watched:

• Brazil 1-0 Croatia: It was probably impossible for Brazil to live up to all the pre-tournament hype, but they're going to have to step it up a notch if they want to win this thing. It's not that they were bad, they just weren't as fantastic as I'd expected. Croatia. meanwhile, are probably the best of what you'd think of as the second-tier European teams -- along with Serbia; if only the country didn't keep splitting into smaller and smaller pieces.
  
  
• Spain 4-0 Ukraine: I'm trying not to get too excited over this result, because chances are they're just going to choke in the quarter-finals, but damn that was a great performance from Spain. They've got an excellent midfield, now that Aragones seems to have stopped fucking around with his lineup (and got over his fear of the colour yellow), and they're very good at holding possession. I thought the penalty for Torres was a bad call by the ref, and I wouldn't be surprised if Shevchenko uses some of Abramovich's rubles to take out a hit on the linesmen, because he got screwed by offside calls a few times, but Spain were cruising in spite of the officiating.

Question of the day: Which of the supposed star strikers has underperformed the most so far? Ronaldo? Thierry Henry? Wee Michael Owen? My vote goes to Henry, because he doesn't have the excuse of recovering from injury or carrying around a whole extra person. Of course, he doesn't have the team built around him the way he does at Arsenal, but still, you expect him not to suck quite this much at an international level.

Oh, and the other advantage to watching the games on tape in the evening? The ability to fast-forward through all the annoying commercials (no more really cool oom-pah-pah bands!) and the half-time blather. I still think the Canadian commentators are better than the guys on ESPN, but really, they shouldn't have so much trouble pronouncing "Thierry Henry." Considering that we speak French here and all.

World Cup update

It's day three of the World Cup and I've managed to watch every game so far. I don't know how long I'll be able to keep this up, seeing as I have, you know, an actual job, but for the moment it's great.

Things we have learned in the past two days:

• Currently leading the pack in the World Cup Bad Hair competition is Sweden's Christian Wilhelmsson with his lopsided rattail (reminiscent of New Kids on the Block circa 1989; unfortunately I haven't been able to find a good picture), followed by fauxhawked Bastian Schweinsteiger of Germany and the entire Argentine team.
  
  
• The vampire who refereed the England-Paraguay game really had it in for Peter Crouch, who constantly got fouls called against him for, as far as I could tell, simply being tall and gangly. Maybe the ref just doesn't like the robot dance.
  
  
• Half the Trinidad and Tobago players seem to have their first and last names backward. Poland has the best names so far, though, with players called "Bonk" and "Yop" (I'm probably not spelling those right, but I'm too lazy to look them up).

In my attempt at more serious analysis (ha!):

• Germany 4-2 Costa Rica: I know Jurgen Klinsmann has been trying to make Germany a more attacking team, but I didn't realize that meant giving them a complete personality transplant. Scoring four goals is great and all, but their back line was so shaky it'd make Newcastle look good by comparison.
  
  
• Poland 0-2 Ecuador: Actually, I fell asleep watching this one. I think it's probably better that way.
  
  
• England 1-0 Paraguay: England, on the other hand, haven't had a personality transplant at all, no matter how much Sven tried to fool us with his squad selection. You know the pattern: Eke out a lead and then hold on like grim death (two words: Owen Hargreaves. Which is not so much "grim death" as "mild case of stomach flu," but anyway). At least they did manage to win withough actually scoring a goal, so that's...good? I guess?
  
  
• Sweden 0-0 Trinidad & Tobago: The upset of the tournament so far (I realize it's only day three, and it was actually a tie, but humour me here). Looking at it as an England fan, this is a great result, but on the other hand, if England play worse when they come up against mediocre opponents (see: England v. Paraguay, among others), then their game against Sweden next week is going to be awful.
  
  
• Argentina 2-1 Cote d'Ivoire: The first game from the group of death (yes, America, it's Group C, not Group E, no matter how much you whine) so I figured it had to be good. The Ivory Coast have a fair bit of talent -- not to mention tons of pace -- but Argentina have even more talent and looked very disciplined. If they keep playing like this, they're going to go far in the tournament. And that'll bug me, because it turns out my dislike for Diego Maradona is even greater than my annoyance with Didier Drogba.

Also, I have to give props (can I even say that, or am I just too white?) to Sportsnet and TSN for their coverage so far. Just look at the TV schedule: that is a thing of beauty. They're airing everything live, and rerunning every game at least once. (And plus there's all the games on the foreign language channels. Yay for Canadian broadcasters.) I haven't been paying a lot of attention to their pre- and post-game coverage, but at least it hasn't made me want to throw things at the TV -- until this morning, when they referred to Arjen Robben as "classy." Perhaps most importantly, they're using the British international feed, rather than ESPN, for their play-by-play commentary, for which I am profoundly grateful. And you should be too, because it means I don't have to rant about it for the next month.

(Speaking of throwing things at my TV, though: those Rogers wireless commercials where they go to Germany and find a "really cool oom-pah-pah band," etc., are on constantly and every time I hate them more. Unlike the Adidas +10 ads, which I could happily watch over and over, and yes I know that makes me a patsy to advertising but I don't care. They make Jermain Defoe play goal!)