Monday, September 04, 2006

Five things about England v. Andorra

  1. If I'm going to pay $20 cover to watch the game at a pub, they really ought to have the TV on the right channel before kickoff. The remote control really isn't that complicated, honest. By they time they got it sorted out, we'd missed the first five minutes of the game, including the opening goal. Bah.

  2. Andorra are really crap. Yes, I know, big shock, but wow, they were bad. I think if you'd put my Friday league team out there, we could have beaten Andorra, because at the very least we understand basic concepts like, for example, staying with your mark.

  3. The game itself wasn't that exciting, so most of the amusement came from watching Steven Gerrard rampaging up and down the right wing and generally being awesome (so much so that I think he turned the Guardian's minute-by-minute guy a little bit gay for him). Highlight: the hilariously slow-motion crossover to bamboozle the Andorran defender before he sent in the cross for Defoe's first goal.

  4. Frank Lampard: Why? He's become a sort of existential dilemma at this point. He was certainly better against Andorra than he was in the World Cup, by virtue of the fact that he didn't spend the entire game blasting shots over the bar, but that's not saying much. I kind of forgot he was on the pitch most of the time. And again: Andorra suck.

  5. Stewart Downing bears an unfortunate resemblance to a hamster, or some other small rodent.

After the England game I hung around to watch the Ireland-Germany match with a couple of my teammates -- one Irish and one German -- who spent the entire 90 minutes arguing with each other, complaining that the referee was biased, and yelling that the other team was cheating and/or was crap. I highly recommend this as a way to spend the afternoon.

Also, this is the point where I make fun of Italy for drawing with Lithuania, who are, as far as I know, only marginally better than Andorra. Way to prove that you deserved that World Cup title, guys.

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